Hamels, making his first start since his ankle injury-shortened April 28th appearance, seemed quite agile coming off the mound, as well as on the basepaths. He also was quite competent on the mound, twirling six strong innings. He retired the first eleven batters he faced, and permitted only two runs, both during a three-batter Braves rally in the fourth inning. The three hits Hamels allowed in the fourth were the only hits the Braves managed off the southpaw, who had seven strikeouts against only two walks. Hamels threw ninety-five pitches, sixty-four for strikes. Given the struggles of the rest of the Phillies' rotation, the team really needs Hamels to pitch like Hamels, or the bullpen will be cooked by June. It was a relief to see Hamels looking dominant, and, perhaps even more importantly, healthy.
What wasn't a relief was closer Brad Lidge's performance, in a non-save situation. It was a bit puzzling that Lidge was brought into a 10-3 ballgame to "get some work in." The Phillies have games Saturday and Sunday, followed by on off-day on Monday. Lidge is unlikely to pitch on three consecutive days, so his Friday appearance likely makes him unavailable for either Saturday or Sunday, either (or both) of which could be save opportunities. It might have been more prudent to save Lidge for a Saturday appearance, regardless of the situation, in which case he would still have been available for Sunday. Given his performance, in which he went walk-double-homer to his first three batters, it's fortunate that it wasn't a save opportunity for Lidge. But the Phillies' bats, on the strength of homers by Jayson Werth, Chris Coste, and Chase Utley, jumped to a 6-0 third-inning lead, and gave Brad Lidge a seven-run cushion for the ninth.
Per the crack Phillies announcing crew, a Calculus teacher of Chad Durbin was at the game, as numerous educators were present, so that they could be appreciated. However, there was insufficient coverage of this appearance, so it is unclear whether this was the pimptacular reliever's only Calculus teacher. There are many among us who are eager to know just how much Calculus Durbin knows.
It is also unclear whether the Calculus teacher had any affiliation with the individual who ran on the field in the sixth inning. It is against the policy of this blog to transmit an account of this individual's idiotic behavior, or to glorify this behavior in any way, shape, or form. However, it is part of the blog's mission statement to educate, so that optimal choices are made. To that end, here are a few rules of thumb to follow when opting to run on the field.
- Choose a later inning, so that you can enjoy as much baseball as possible. Consider WE %, when planning your run.
- Make certain that your run will be filmed, for YouTube purposes, from different angles, if possible.
- Choose your attire properly. While dressing like a matador would be memorable, a simple t-shirt would be best for mobility. Make a nod to the intimidating history of your city and/or team. A Philadelphia fan could wear a Ugueth Urbina Phillies shirt, or a Legion of Doom Flyers hockey shirt. (A t-shirt featuring a caricature of any Philly athlete who has been suspended for violent/erratic behavior would also be acceptable.)
- Be sure to stretch before your run. Jog/run sprints in the concourse, if possible.
- Plan your route. While you may wish to begin your journey by sliding into a base, you can maximize your time on the field by utilizing the spacious outfield. Stay away from the pitcher's mound, as it can be rather hazardous. (One exception to this rule would be if you choose to prostrate yourself in front of Cole Hamels, as your stirring denouement.)
- Get a haircut the day of the game, so you will look good for your mug shot.
Phillies face the Braves Saturday afternoon, in a game the FOX Overlords may not want you to see. Javier Vazquez starts for the Braves, Joe Blanton for the Phils. Blanton continues his quest to reach the seventh inning, as insanity tugs at his currently-sound mind.
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